Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Grindhouse?

Werewolves On Wheels
(1971)


What the heck did I just watch?

Some bikers do drugs, fight, drink, get mixed up with a sect of Satanists, and develop lycanthropy  - which does not hamper their ability to ride. Either this was a really shitty movie or that wasn't ibuprofen that I took.

A tarot-reading biker named...Tarot, predicts deaths which no one believes. He leads them to the "real shit" which turns out to be the monastery of a bunch of devil worshiping monks who drug them and try to steal the leader's woman. After some spastic naked go-go dancing with snakes, the girl gets rescued and they split. The next night two turn up dead, probable coyote victims. They drive on, make camp somewhere else, and another member is attacked and barbequed. They head back to do-in the monks only to have a sandstorm magical sweep them off the highway and deposit them in the middle of the desert - I kid you not. They make camp again, where two turn into werewolves and get served. They growl like baby lions and one of them tries to make a getaway on a motorcycle. I'm not even going to try to interpret the end of this.

Whoever wrote this was really fucking stoned, though it would probably have made an interesting comic.

4 comments:

  1. ...can't tell you how many times I've barked "Now you're just fucking with me!!!" at my TV screen throughout this years Horrorfest...

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  2. The worst part is that I watched this on the FrightPix channel of my Roku box. FrightPix has repetitive commercial breaks (literally) and rolls the film back a little after EVERY break. Between making a really horrible film last 25% longer and watching the same Downy Unstoppables ad 15 times, it's enough to drive you insane.

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  3. BTW, Roku is the greatest thing EVER.

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  4. I agree. Soon as I get a new job, I'm upgrading to the subtitles compatible one.

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