Nephilim...they just grow up so fast.

The Prophecy 3: The Ascent
(2000)


The son of a Hispanic human woman and an Asian-looking angel grows up to be a White kid with religion issues. I'll let you ponder that a moment.

Perplexing? How about this one: only about two years have passed since his birth, but the kid is like 18. 

Anyway, the action starts after everyone's favorite Angel of Death-turned-homless horn-player, Gabriel shows up. Well, maybe he's not so homeless anymore since he drives into the scene, which is a makeshift church. A bunch of lost souls are being ministered to by Danyael (Dave Buzzotta), who is then gunned down by some suspicious looking blind guy with incredibly good aim.

Jump ahead to a scene where Gabriel tries to tell the presiding detective that he's 39. Zophael Jones, an angel of questionable allegiance shows up at the precinct to insure Danyael doesn't rise. Jones know how to fake and FBI badge but doesn't know what a door buzzer is. He has a run-in with Gabriel, whom he chastises for being human and offers to change. Gabe declines, saying, "I used to be the Angel of Death. Now I die everyday when I have the cash." No, he's not talking about heroin.

Zophael eventually catches up with Danyael in a doughnut shop. There's a funny scene where he threatens the clerk when he tries to extort money:

Zophael: You answer my question, or I'll personally see to it that you spend the next millennium chained to a damp wall, wondering just what that is that's been winding its way up through your bowels for the last 750 years.

Clerk: Cool.

 Yeah, sorry bro, but 50 bucks is 50 bucks.

So a chase ensues, a girlfriend gets nabbed, and Gabriel tails them, helping out when he can. Danyael defeats Jones and a new player, Pyriel, Angel of Genocide. Angel of Death. Angel of Genocide. Where is the Angel of Spreading Love and Joy? Personally, they can keep heaven if it's filled with those guys.

I give this a 8. Danyael's girlfriend was annoying and Zophael's game was paper thin for one supposedly known for being duplicitous. Also, Gabriel's reconciliation with God should have been less subtle. I mean the guy spent at least 3/4 of the time we've known him, killing people. Then he gets turned mortal as punishment, discovers the trumpet and pussy and now - pouf - he's just absolved. that could have went better.

Next up: two monster movies I need to finish