The Prophecy: Forsaken
(2005)
There isn't even much to say about this other than it stars Tony Todd and Jason Scott Lee. Candy Man puts the Dragon to the task of eliminating the keeper of the tome from the previous movie (this is a direct sequel). He has second thoughts and we have 60 more minutes.
Apparently now the book will prophesy who the antichrist is. Candy Man wants to off the child before Armageddon can start. In the end his plan is thwarted by a method that could just as easily been done with a match and less personal injury.
At lease this movie began with subtitles. Although, the priest spoke for like two minutes and the words only read, "No, it can't be." Todd and Scott have aged well. Thus concludes The Prophecy series. Do yourself a favor and stop at 3.
Verdict: Miss-able
7
Showing posts with label Angels. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Angels. Show all posts
Sunday, October 13, 2013
Interpreter Needed
The Prophecy: Uprising
(2005)
Eastern Europe. Whenever film companies wants to beat a dying horse - and do it with cheap help - they situate the next installation in Eastern Europe. That said, this wasn't a bad sequel so much as it was annoying that someone (either at Netflix or encoding) didn't see fit to provide subtitles. Nearly the whole first half of the movie is spoken in some guttural Slavic language (probably Polish) with intermittent bursts of equally unintelligible English.
This whole movie is about the pursuit of a book called the 'something Lexicon', which is the final word of God, being written as you read it. There's a body-jumping demon named Belial after it, and a couple of angels trying to keep it from him. The bulk of the movie is pretty much common fare for the franchise. There's a twist at the end that I wasn't really expecting. Now that I have time to think about it, it doesn't add up that this particular character could have been in this form since the 1930s in Eastern Europe, but be in a different form in the US in the mid-90's. Whatever.
I don't think the movie stars anyone you'd notice.
Maybe a 7.
Verdict: Miss-able
(2005)
Eastern Europe. Whenever film companies wants to beat a dying horse - and do it with cheap help - they situate the next installation in Eastern Europe. That said, this wasn't a bad sequel so much as it was annoying that someone (either at Netflix or encoding) didn't see fit to provide subtitles. Nearly the whole first half of the movie is spoken in some guttural Slavic language (probably Polish) with intermittent bursts of equally unintelligible English.
This whole movie is about the pursuit of a book called the 'something Lexicon', which is the final word of God, being written as you read it. There's a body-jumping demon named Belial after it, and a couple of angels trying to keep it from him. The bulk of the movie is pretty much common fare for the franchise. There's a twist at the end that I wasn't really expecting. Now that I have time to think about it, it doesn't add up that this particular character could have been in this form since the 1930s in Eastern Europe, but be in a different form in the US in the mid-90's. Whatever.
I don't think the movie stars anyone you'd notice.
Maybe a 7.
Verdict: Miss-able
Saturday, October 12, 2013
Nephilim...they just grow up so fast.
The Prophecy 3: The Ascent
(2000)
The son of a Hispanic human woman and an Asian-looking angel grows up to be a White kid with religion issues. I'll let you ponder that a moment.
Perplexing? How about this one: only about two years have passed since his birth, but the kid is like 18.
Anyway, the action starts after everyone's favorite Angel of Death-turned-homless horn-player, Gabriel shows up. Well, maybe he's not so homeless anymore since he drives into the scene, which is a makeshift church. A bunch of lost souls are being ministered to by Danyael (Dave Buzzotta), who is then gunned down by some suspicious looking blind guy with incredibly good aim.
Jump ahead to a scene where Gabriel tries to tell the presiding detective that he's 39. Zophael Jones, an angel of questionable allegiance shows up at the precinct to insure Danyael doesn't rise. Jones know how to fake and FBI badge but doesn't know what a door buzzer is. He has a run-in with Gabriel, whom he chastises for being human and offers to change. Gabe declines, saying, "I used to be the Angel of Death. Now I die everyday when I have the cash." No, he's not talking about heroin.
Zophael eventually catches up with Danyael in a doughnut shop. There's a funny scene where he threatens the clerk when he tries to extort money:
So a chase ensues, a girlfriend gets nabbed, and Gabriel tails them, helping out when he can. Danyael defeats Jones and a new player, Pyriel, Angel of Genocide. Angel of Death. Angel of Genocide. Where is the Angel of Spreading Love and Joy? Personally, they can keep heaven if it's filled with those guys.
I give this a 8. Danyael's girlfriend was annoying and Zophael's game was paper thin for one supposedly known for being duplicitous. Also, Gabriel's reconciliation with God should have been less subtle. I mean the guy spent at least 3/4 of the time we've known him, killing people. Then he gets turned mortal as punishment, discovers the trumpet and pussy and now - pouf - he's just absolved. that could have went better.
Next up: two monster movies I need to finish
(2000)
The son of a Hispanic human woman and an Asian-looking angel grows up to be a White kid with religion issues. I'll let you ponder that a moment.
Perplexing? How about this one: only about two years have passed since his birth, but the kid is like 18.
Anyway, the action starts after everyone's favorite Angel of Death-turned-homless horn-player, Gabriel shows up. Well, maybe he's not so homeless anymore since he drives into the scene, which is a makeshift church. A bunch of lost souls are being ministered to by Danyael (Dave Buzzotta), who is then gunned down by some suspicious looking blind guy with incredibly good aim.
Jump ahead to a scene where Gabriel tries to tell the presiding detective that he's 39. Zophael Jones, an angel of questionable allegiance shows up at the precinct to insure Danyael doesn't rise. Jones know how to fake and FBI badge but doesn't know what a door buzzer is. He has a run-in with Gabriel, whom he chastises for being human and offers to change. Gabe declines, saying, "I used to be the Angel of Death. Now I die everyday when I have the cash." No, he's not talking about heroin.
Zophael eventually catches up with Danyael in a doughnut shop. There's a funny scene where he threatens the clerk when he tries to extort money:
Zophael: You answer my question, or I'll personally see to it that you spend the next millennium chained to a damp wall, wondering just what that is that's been winding its way up through your bowels for the last 750 years.
Clerk: Cool.Yeah, sorry bro, but 50 bucks is 50 bucks.
So a chase ensues, a girlfriend gets nabbed, and Gabriel tails them, helping out when he can. Danyael defeats Jones and a new player, Pyriel, Angel of Genocide. Angel of Death. Angel of Genocide. Where is the Angel of Spreading Love and Joy? Personally, they can keep heaven if it's filled with those guys.
I give this a 8. Danyael's girlfriend was annoying and Zophael's game was paper thin for one supposedly known for being duplicitous. Also, Gabriel's reconciliation with God should have been less subtle. I mean the guy spent at least 3/4 of the time we've known him, killing people. Then he gets turned mortal as punishment, discovers the trumpet and pussy and now - pouf - he's just absolved. that could have went better.
Next up: two monster movies I need to finish
"My enemy's friend is my enemy."
The Prophecy 2
(1998)
On her way to work, a nurse nails a guy who just seems to fall from the sky.
Det. Thomas Daggett, plagued by visions since the incident four years ago, has joined a monastic order and is in his cell, screaming about the coming of some terrible thing.
In a deserted parking lot, Lucifer expells Gabriel from hell, saying that it's not big enough for the both of them. I wonder how the person whose car is now partially submerged into the once molten ground is going to explain that to their insurance company.
Meanwhile, Nurse Valerie (Jennifer Beals) is taken with Danyael, the guy she nailed with her car. After seeing him entertaining some kids in the children's ward, she lets him walk her home (even though she drives to work and doesn't seem to live close by). He puts the moves on her and after some passionate naked caressing, asks if she "accepts him." Personally, I think that's kind of creepy, but she consents and the penetration starts. Almost seems like he put her in a semi-crucified position, which is even kinkier than just banging an angel. Danyael is played by Russell Wong, by the way. He could crucify me any day.
Anywho, it seems Danyael has been put to the task of inseminating a human woman, by Archangel Micheal, in order to produce a nephilim (a half human/half angelic being). The angels who are still loyal to God want to use the nephilim to unite the kingdom of heaven and end the war. The opposing party thinks the nephilim are an abomination; recalling that God ordered them all destroyed in the first days of man. Gabriel is down with the latter. He goes on the hunt for Valerie but has some computer problems, sparking one of the film's most memorable lines uttered by Izzy, a recently acquired suicide victim.
Gabriel uses his new tech support/chauffeur to track down and corner
Valerie, but she gets away with a little help. In one scene, he asks Izzy to try an avoid
hitting a dog. Mind you, he's been killing folks since the first
installation, but apparently he's an animal lover - as long as they aren't the human kind. PETA would be proud.
Fast forward to the end.
Valerie seeks shelter in Eden - an industrial wasteland of sorts - with Danyael and a host of other angels, including Michael. Considering that the nephilim is to be their ace-in-the-hole, the angels seem somewhat disinterested and lackadaisical about protecting its vessel. Lucky for Valerie, faith sustains her. In the end, Gabriel pays the ultimate price and we meet him later as a homeless, human horn-player (huh?). The movie ends with him stating that, "...one day the phone gonna ring and everything will be like it was." Or something like that.
Points of Interest:
Glenn Danzig is in this movie and, in the opening credits, gets top billing over seasoned actor, Eric Roberts. I hope this was just about "D" coming before "R" in the alphabet. Danzig had like one line, then got his heart ripped out by Wong, while Roberts played Michael, a considerably more notable character.
I love how Gabriel always sounds like a Brooklyn mobster.
Verdict: Great installation to the franchise.
10
(1998)
On her way to work, a nurse nails a guy who just seems to fall from the sky.
Det. Thomas Daggett, plagued by visions since the incident four years ago, has joined a monastic order and is in his cell, screaming about the coming of some terrible thing.
In a deserted parking lot, Lucifer expells Gabriel from hell, saying that it's not big enough for the both of them. I wonder how the person whose car is now partially submerged into the once molten ground is going to explain that to their insurance company.
Meanwhile, Nurse Valerie (Jennifer Beals) is taken with Danyael, the guy she nailed with her car. After seeing him entertaining some kids in the children's ward, she lets him walk her home (even though she drives to work and doesn't seem to live close by). He puts the moves on her and after some passionate naked caressing, asks if she "accepts him." Personally, I think that's kind of creepy, but she consents and the penetration starts. Almost seems like he put her in a semi-crucified position, which is even kinkier than just banging an angel. Danyael is played by Russell Wong, by the way. He could crucify me any day.
 |
| Mr. Wong |
 |
| This might be the best Brittany Murphy has ever looked. |
Fast forward to the end.
Valerie seeks shelter in Eden - an industrial wasteland of sorts - with Danyael and a host of other angels, including Michael. Considering that the nephilim is to be their ace-in-the-hole, the angels seem somewhat disinterested and lackadaisical about protecting its vessel. Lucky for Valerie, faith sustains her. In the end, Gabriel pays the ultimate price and we meet him later as a homeless, human horn-player (huh?). The movie ends with him stating that, "...one day the phone gonna ring and everything will be like it was." Or something like that.
Points of Interest:
Glenn Danzig is in this movie and, in the opening credits, gets top billing over seasoned actor, Eric Roberts. I hope this was just about "D" coming before "R" in the alphabet. Danzig had like one line, then got his heart ripped out by Wong, while Roberts played Michael, a considerably more notable character.
 |
| Gabriel (Walken) and Samayel (Danzig) |
Verdict: Great installation to the franchise.
10
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
"Never Trust A F*cking Angel!"
The Prophecy
(1995)
Two words: Christopher Walken
If that's not enough, here are a few more:
I should state the obvious: this movie is NOT for the devout. It pushes a LOT of religious buttons, and deals with themes of blind and interpretive faith, general warfare, and the disconnect between the upper and lower branches of military.
According to the movie mythos, angels are soulless creatures (ironically played by ginger, Eric Stoltz, and the ever-creepy Walken) who are divided into two warring factions in heaven: those that are good little soldiers in God's army, and those that are pissed that angels are being trumped by humans for God's favor. The AAs (angry angels) have come to earth to collect the evilest soul available - one that will act like fly paper for other evil souls. They plan to use it to gain strategic footing in their war. It's only fitting that the soul belongs to a deceased colonel. We'll get back to him. Soulless gin-er-I mean-angel Simon (Stoltz) intercepts the soul and goes on the run. He doesn't make it too far. Enter Gabriel (Walken), Angel of Death and general bad-ass.
Simon, who was hanging out in an abandoned school, "gives" the soul to a little Native American girl in a scene that promised to be straight out of Law & Order: SVU. Gabriel and his undead minion go looking for her and run into homicide detective, Thomas Dagget, ex-seminary student, theology scholar, and writer. Det. Dagget and a school teacher (Virginia Madsen) try to protect the girl from Gabriel, receiving some consultation from Lucifer. The mere fact that the Devil is a consultant for the "good" team in this movie makes it worth watching. The Devil becomes instrumental in their victory even though his assistance is self-serving. In addition, it's traditional (i.e. pagan) Native religious ceremony that ends up healing the girl, turning the screw a little more.
Points of interest:
I never noticed before how the angels perch on things like large, demonic birds.
I also never noticed how easily it seems people in the film accept the "evil angels did it" explanation for the situations that occur. The movie is expedited along its path partly because no one makes a fuss about how none of it can be logically possible -not even in the police department.
Col. Hawthorne, the evil soul, has in his possession an official evidence reel of his gruesome war crimes and trial, and a locked metal case containing actual death masks. How was he realistically able to keep either - especially the box of masks that he is clearly seen holding in the evidence film?
Viggo Mortensen, who played Lucifer, went on to portray Aragorn, the last direct descendant of the true Kings of Men. I feel like there's a parallel there...or several.
Best Line:
"...for while heaven may be closed, I am always open...even on Christmas."
Verdict: must watch
9.5
(1995)
Two words: Christopher Walken
If that's not enough, here are a few more:
I should state the obvious: this movie is NOT for the devout. It pushes a LOT of religious buttons, and deals with themes of blind and interpretive faith, general warfare, and the disconnect between the upper and lower branches of military.
According to the movie mythos, angels are soulless creatures (ironically played by ginger, Eric Stoltz, and the ever-creepy Walken) who are divided into two warring factions in heaven: those that are good little soldiers in God's army, and those that are pissed that angels are being trumped by humans for God's favor. The AAs (angry angels) have come to earth to collect the evilest soul available - one that will act like fly paper for other evil souls. They plan to use it to gain strategic footing in their war. It's only fitting that the soul belongs to a deceased colonel. We'll get back to him. Soulless gin-er-I mean-angel Simon (Stoltz) intercepts the soul and goes on the run. He doesn't make it too far. Enter Gabriel (Walken), Angel of Death and general bad-ass.
Simon, who was hanging out in an abandoned school, "gives" the soul to a little Native American girl in a scene that promised to be straight out of Law & Order: SVU. Gabriel and his undead minion go looking for her and run into homicide detective, Thomas Dagget, ex-seminary student, theology scholar, and writer. Det. Dagget and a school teacher (Virginia Madsen) try to protect the girl from Gabriel, receiving some consultation from Lucifer. The mere fact that the Devil is a consultant for the "good" team in this movie makes it worth watching. The Devil becomes instrumental in their victory even though his assistance is self-serving. In addition, it's traditional (i.e. pagan) Native religious ceremony that ends up healing the girl, turning the screw a little more.
Points of interest:
I never noticed before how the angels perch on things like large, demonic birds.
I also never noticed how easily it seems people in the film accept the "evil angels did it" explanation for the situations that occur. The movie is expedited along its path partly because no one makes a fuss about how none of it can be logically possible -not even in the police department.
Col. Hawthorne, the evil soul, has in his possession an official evidence reel of his gruesome war crimes and trial, and a locked metal case containing actual death masks. How was he realistically able to keep either - especially the box of masks that he is clearly seen holding in the evidence film?
Viggo Mortensen, who played Lucifer, went on to portray Aragorn, the last direct descendant of the true Kings of Men. I feel like there's a parallel there...or several.
Best Line:
"...for while heaven may be closed, I am always open...even on Christmas."
Verdict: must watch
9.5
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