Tuesday, October 30, 2012

What do you call something that's half frog and half duck?

The Toxic Avenger 3: The Last Temptation of Toxie

     Once again, Toxie's back and spends the first 12 minutes in a flash back scene brutally slaughtering those pesky tools from the Apocalypse Corp. After that, it looks an awful lot like Toxic Avenger 2. This time, Toxie sells his soul to the Devil so that his girl Claire could have some new eyes. In doing so, he turns into Tromavilles biggest asshole and a bit of a corporate tool. And Claire, by the way, needs to swallow a damn cheeseburger once in awhile ..anemic little skank. Anyway, Toxie finally realizes what a shill he is, and starts tearing Apocalypse thugs new buttholes. The final battle(s) is between the CEO of Apocalypse, which just happens to be the Devil. During the battle, Toxie is reverted back to his original nerdy self and trust me, you'll want to punch and kick him to sleep the second he opens his mouth. Naturally, truth, justice, and toxic waste prevail and the movie closes with Toxie and Claire getting hitched. Awww.....
     I've made the accusation that Lloyd Kaufman smoked a lot of weed while directing/producing this film. Now I'm starting to think I was the stoned one. I never touched the stuff in junior high, but how do I explain watching these movies sober and liking them? Most likely I was hopped up on Cherry Coke and Heyday bars. As stated in before, parts 2 & 3 were to be a single movie but there was so much footage, they produced 2 sequels. Despite knowing this fact, I didn't like this as much as the 2nd and it's nowhere near as good as the 1st.  However, there's one more sequel and one more shot at redemption...but I'm not holding my breath.

 Toxie Facts!-->

Toxie takes lightning dumps and doesn't have to take his pants off to do it. Not even to wipe!

Toxie can now pee like a fire hose, but the green sludge has made way for a more normal clear liquid. Maybe it was just a bladder infection.

Wednesday: Finale


1 comment:

  1. I tried to do a toxic avenger marathon either last year or before and I got as far as Toxie in Tokyo before I had to call it in. They really should've stopped at the first one.

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