In space, nobody can hear you face-palm....

 Jason X

    Uhh....somehow Jason is still alive and in a research facility. You know how well that will work, so he inevitably escapes. While attempting to to murder everyone in the facility, he's trapped in a cryo tank and frozen, but not before claiming one last victim. We jump ahead 445  year, and super smart future people open his tank and even frozen, he still manages to cut someones arm off! After a bunch of sciency stuff, both Jason and last victim are revived. And as you know, things get a lot stabbier when that happens.

     While Jason does his prey-stalking you're treated to a bunch of typical future space tropes including, but not limited to, a Space Machete. In a lot of ways, it reminded me of Andromeda and I half expected Sorbo to to be a deus ex machina. At about the 3/4 point in the movie, Jason is beat back into an infirmary where nanobot things reformat him to become Future Space Jason. Sure...I'll buy it. A lot of nuttier things have happened in this franchise. Makes perfect sense. We've had Hellraiser and Leprechaun in space, so why the hell not?

Don't worry. She's a robot that nobody liked.

    The only scene that saved this movie was the virtual campers. It almost makes up for this superfluous Jason vs Star Trek film. You don't really need to watch the entire movie, so just jump to that scene and call it watched!

"Hey, you want to drink a beer?"

Deaths by: Stabbing, spearing, freezing face mash, stabbing by future machete, wall+skull bash, neck snapping, impalement with an auger, machete to throat, chopping in half, beheading, electrocution, and sucked through vent via cabin decompression.


Saturday: This has NOTHING to do with candy....