Chanbara Beauty: Vortex The Movie
At least I think that's the proper
order of the title. It's not always as clear as you'd think. It also
went by OneChanbara: Bikini Zombie Slayers. And it's actually a
sequel on top of that. How does this movie differ from the rest? Not
much, really. Same school girl outfits, same over the top bloody
violence, same weirdness, same kick-ass heroines that have amazing
fighting skill despite still being in high school (evidently), and
more zombies.
 |
| "This is what I wear throughout this entire movie. I don't wear pants. I might be a little skanky" |
And I guess that's the plot. Young
women run around killing zombies in a post apocalyptic world where
clothing is scarce (apparently) but there's always a techno-pop score
in the background. There's a lot of drama but it doesn't tie into the
story very well. That's mostly because there really isn't a story. It
might have something to do with this film being based on a video
game. And everyone knows that video games make the best movies,
right? RIGHT? Oh sure, there's a back-story involving harvesting
special blood and becoming immortal, but it's not written for anyone
to care about. It's time filler till the next bloody bikini sword
battle.
Honestly, this was terrible, but far
better, and far less insane than Sunday and Monday's features. No
damn tentacles or parasites. Just zombie chopping and a lot of
typical nonsense but with better editing.
Wednesday: So...why do all the men a bunch of sissy's in these films?
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