In what is clearly written by a 13 yr old deep in the throws of puberty, we're introduced to a high school volleyball team at the semester's end. They decided to throw a party and watch scary movies or some crap like that. At the same time, the most homoerotic football team party is going down and they're all wearing t-shirts that say "Football Player" if you weren't sure of their sports affiliation. Eventually, 2 of the dude-bros leave the cuddle party and crash the ladies party...terribly. After a couple of the idiots are killed by some dork named Chef Death, it's everyone for themselves...don't forget the daquries.
In a strange turn of events, I'm not rooting for the killer. He's a dork that spews culinary one-liners faster than you can say "Flava town". However, the audio is questionable so you don't hear it very well. There's also not near as many bewbs as I thought there would. Honestly, it wouldn't have helped this...whatever this is. After the end credits you're treated to a music video by a band called White Liger to further add insult to injury.
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| Relax, he had a bottle cleaner in his pocket. |
I get it, the whole movie is a joke. It's mostly satirical and that's probably why I liked it just as much as it annoyed me. Still better than that stupid bong movie....Thankfully, this ride ends around 70 minutes so your punishment isn't eternal....but you ain't getting it back either.
The real horror is knowing there's 2 more sequels. But that's for another year.
Thursday: Prometheus Unbound...with a machete...
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