Progenitor of the Endless Sequel

Friday The 13th

     This years marathon is one of the Big Daddy O.G.'s. This made summer camp scary, and somehow wedged horny teens, machetes, and hockey masks all into one horror film. From there, the 30 year reign of some scary movies, and a lot of turds. But who cares?!? I'm watching them ALL!!

     We start out at Camp Crystal Lake in 1958. A couple of horny teens deep in hormonal rage drift away from the group to see who's the best groper. Some nameless person giving us the 1st person perspective takes exception to it and chops/stabs the lustful demons away. What'd you expect?!? It's Jersey!

You tell it, brother!

     Skip ahead to present day, and new young faces start to showing up to the 'cursed camp' and our faceless killer starts picking them off one by one. Hell, the first one didn't even get to the camp! She was killed hitch hiking her way there. Her luck just sucked! But on the bright side, it saved a lot of unnecessary running. The rest go in what is now commonly gory ways: Throat slashing, throat stabbing, ax to the head, normal stabbing, pin the arrow on the dunderhead, and one final decapitation. Oddly enough, for everything you've ever seen about this series and all the icons included, Jason w/hockey mask is NOT ever seen. Just his crazy bitch-ass mum.

     So what did we learn from this one? Halloween was ground breaking and I get the impression that this one needed to one-up that film with gore and a slight twist to the ending while keeping it away from similarities in the story line and creating it's own identity. But remember, this is just the first film. They never really anticipated a sequel...or 10 others...

Star List:

     Kevin Fucking Bacon!...and nobody else worth mentioning.


Tuesday: FFS, I just realized they're not really movies, just episodes...