Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Ug...French cinema...

Le Viol du Vampire, or The Rape Of The Vampire...

     Of for the love of Christ... It should be known that the French ruined cinema long ago, and this is a prime example. Sure, it could be my bias; I hate the slutty phlegmy noises they call 'speaking French'. But simply put, they did to cinema what the Germans did to porn.
     Regardless, this is the movie I picked, so I'll stick with it. First and foremost, I don't speak French, and my copy wasn't subbed. So, that led to a lot of guess work, and after 20 minutes, I stated making up my own dialog. I'm pretty sure mine was better. All I know is what I read on Wiki (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Rape_of_the_Vampire). Oddly enough, there's more to read than I thought there would be, and it's worth your time because I can't sum it up quite as well in the limited space we have.
     I do know this, however....it blew, and I don't remember seeing any vampires. Just a bunch of frail, skinny, overly French twatwaffles running around doing nothing of consequence.

Wednesday: A story about a dog, and it's not friggin' Cujo.

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