Tuesday, October 1, 2024

Count Dooku vs The Equilizer

Celebrating Year 15-ish!!!


Wicker Man (1973)

     I've seen this talked about for years, but I've never taken the time to watch. Now it seems a good time to check this out and avoid the Nick Cage version.

     We start with our protagonist policeman who just happens to be The Equalizer. No, not Denzel or Queen Latifah. The original: Edward Woodward. And let me tell you, he's stiff as a board. stoic, and confounded by the eccentric town he's been dispatched to for a missing child investigation. Within 16 minutes we're treated to the officer walking through a field at night while half the village is screwing their brains out...right out there in the open. Eccentric? Yes...but WAY more fun than...um...not having sex in the out doors. It turns out the entire town is a pagan haven, while he's a devout Christian. Needless to say, this befuddles his sensibilities. I don't think he's ever been around this many naked people. This poor repressed man is going crazy and nobody wants to help him find the missing girl. 

Well, that's because the girl isn't missing. She's bait to bring him to the island so he can be the sacrifice rather than her. He finds the little girl, alright...then he's burnt in a wicker cage. And then Burning Man ripped it off and gave middle aged Gen-Xers and Millennials a place to trip balls and fuck while dressed like an extra in The Road Warrior.




Things of note:

There's way too much singing in this

 It's a great movie to nap to

Christopher Lee is, for once, playing a much different character. No vampires, Sith, or soldier. Just a pagan hippy in a blazer.  I've never seen his hair this long:


And then he made it longer so he could look like Cher...


Wednesday: Enough with the classics! It's time for some fuckery!!!


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